No Holds Barred! 06-11-07

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 Everything above this line is NOT a sponsor of
  No Holds Barred! and is put there by Topica.


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       Welcome to all the new subscribers!
Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!


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A woman asks her husband to buy her a fur coat
for their 25th anniversary.  "HA," he snorted.
"The day I buy you a fur coat will be the day
you can grow hair on your chest!"

On that, she hikes up her skirt, drops her panties,
and thrust her pubic area forward. "There! I have
hair on my chest, now buy me a fur coat."

"That's not your chest!" he roars back.

"Damn right it's my chest." she argued. "Before
we got married, this was your hope chest. On
our honeymoon, it was your treasure chest.
Afterwards, it became our family chest. AND
IF YOU DON'T BUY ME A FUR COAT IT WILL
SOON BECOME THE COMMUNITY CHEST!"

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Q: Do I have to be married to have safe fax?
A: Although married people fax quite often, there are many single
people who fax complete strangers every day.

Q: My parents say they never had fax when they were young and
had to write memos to each other until they were twenty one. How
old do you think someone should be before they fax?
A: Faxing can be performed at any age, once you learn the correct
procedure.

Q: If I fax something to myself, will I go blind?
A: Certainly not, as far as we can see.

Q: There is a place on our street where you can go and pay to fax.
Is this legal?
A: Yes. Many people have no other outlet for their fax drives and
must pay a "professional" when their need to fax becomes too great.

Q: Should a cover always be used for faxing?
A: Unless you are really sure of the one you are faxing, a cover
should be used to insure safe faxing.

Q: What happens when I incorrectly do the procedure and I fax
prematurely?
A: Don't panic. Many people prematurely fax when they haven't
faxed in a long time. Just start over (most people don't mind if
you try again).

Q: I have a personal and a business fax. Can transmissions
become mixed up?
A: Being bi-faxual can be confusing, but as long as you use a
cover with each one, you won't transmit anything you're not
supposed to.

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Three men die in a car accident Christmas eve.They all find themselves
at the pearly gates waiting to enter Heaven.  On entering they must
present something Christmassy.

The first man searches his pocket, and finds some mistletoe, so he is
allowed in.

The second man presents a Christmas card, so he is also allowed in.

The third man pulls out a pair of panties. Confused at this last
gesture , St. Peter asks "how do these represent Christmas?"

He answered, "they're Carol's."

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More to come later....just remember there are "No Holds Barred" !!

Everything below this line is put in by Topica and
      is NOT a sponsor of "No Holds Barred" !!

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