Fun4U: Converting Bears

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A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains to
    the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette.
 
 They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk
    shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
    really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear. One
    thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They would all
    go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert
    it. Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.
 
 Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
    various bandages, goes first.
 
 "Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I
    found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear
    wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly
    grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God,
    he became as gentle as a lamb.
 
 The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and
    confirmation."
 
 Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and
    both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone
    oratory he claimed,
 
 "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me
    a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But
    that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we
    began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
    until we came to a creek. So I quickly DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his
    hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We
    spent the rest of the time praising Jesus."
 
 They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He
    was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and
    out of him. He was in bad shape. The rabbi looks up and says,
 
 "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start
    things out with my bear".
 
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