Fun4U: Bizarre 911 Calls

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Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
 Caller: Hi, is this the police?
 Dispatcher: This is 911. Do you need police assistance?
 Caller: Well, I don't know who to call. Can you tell me how to cook a turkey? I've never cooked one before.
 
 Dispatcher: Nine-one-one. What is the nature of your emergency?
 Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
 Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
 Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one.
 Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
 Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
 
 Dispatcher: Nine-one-one. What's the nature of your emergency?
 Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart.
 Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
 Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband.
 
 Dispatcher: Nine-one-one.
 Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn. I think I'm going to pass out.
 Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
 Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster. Damn.
 Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
 Caller: No.
 Dispatcher: What where you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
 Caller: Running from the police.
 
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