Monday, 11 February 2008

No Holds Barred! 02-10-08



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No Holds Barred! and is put there by Topica.


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Welcome to all the new subscribers!
Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!


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Science marches on ..........

Yesterday scientists revealed that beer contains small
traces of female hormones.

To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men 12 pints
of beer and observed that 100% of them:

* gained weight,
* talked excessively without making sense,
* became emotional,
* couldn't drive, and
* refused to apologize when wrong.

........ No further testing is planned.

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A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He
handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait.

Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back
in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached
a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point."

The next class the professor handed the graded tests back out.
This student got back his test, his test grade, and $64 change.

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In the mid-eighties, when it was still fashionable to sell weapons to
the war-torn Middle East, Britain shipped 6 Harrier jump jets to Syria.
During delivery, these were landed in an airfield in Cyprus for the
night, where they were to be guarded by a crack squad of local Greek
soldiers.

Sadly, this turned out to mean a couple of bored squaddies, one of whom
decided to impress his mate by doing "pull-ups" on the nose cone of one
of the £20 million planes.

However, the radar spike proved to be less sturdy than he'd imagined,
and it immediately bent down 90 degrees, resisting all attempts to
straighten it again.

Panicking at the damage he'd caused, the un-named private then adopted a
course of action worthy of the Victoria Cross for stupidity. He walked
down he line of 6 jets, bending the radar spike on each one. He claimed,
at his subsequent court martial, that he had "hoped nobody would notice
the difference if they all looked like that."

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More to come later....just remember there are "No Holds Barred" !!

Everything below this line is put in by Topica and
is NOT a sponsor of "No Holds Barred" !!

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