JE - Proof Beer is Bad

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wednesday 29th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Eegads.. it's still freezing here. Still, only two days to the
weekend. Things could be worse..

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Proof Beer IS Bad
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/proof.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/proof.htm "> AOL </a>

Strange Dolphin
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dolphin.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dolphin.htm "> AOL </a>

Gun Control Works
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/control.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/control.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A man was out of town on business and met a lady in a wine-bar. They
engaged in conversation which eventually turned sexy. The lady
asked him if he had ever been in a mother and daughter combination,
to which he said, "No".

She then asked him if he would like to experience it. He figured
she was about forty years old and wasn't bad looking so he conjured
up visions of him being with her and her about twenty year old
daughter. He, trying to appear not too eager, agreed that sounded
like fun. So they left the bar to go to her house.

The lady unlocked the door, turned a lamp on low, walked to a closed
door and said, "Mother', wake up, we have company for the night.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26321515
or send a blank email to leave-26321515-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

Fun4U: Talking Italian

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage
in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their
conversation at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears
one of the men say the following:

"Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, they come together. I come
again. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee
twice. Then I come once-a-more."

"You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country
we don't talk about our sex lives in public."

"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Imma just tella my friend howa to
spella Mississippi."

-=[-(3660)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3660 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: Golf and Public Restrooms

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

10. Keep your back straight, knees bent, feet shoulder width apart.

9. Form a loose grip.

8. Keep your head down.

7. Avoid a quick backswing.

6. Stay out of the water.

5. Try not to hit anybody.

4. If you are taking too long, you should let others go ahead of you.

3. You shouldn't stand directly in front of others.

2. Be quiet while others are about to go.

1. Keep strokes to a minimum.

-=[-(3659)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3659 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

JE - Oh Canada..

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Monday 27th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Howdy one and all..
I had a very interesting weekend, considering the miserable Scottish
weather I endure through living in northern outpost. Ordinarily, you
see, Scotland is a wonderful little country, but then winter descends
(usually around Autumn time) and then it's curtains for 5 months.

Get the heating on and prepare to hibernate - it's the only way.

OR, carry on as normal (I try to) and attempt to party on a Saturday
night once you have braved the elements and arrived at nice bar soaked
through and on the verge of hypothermia. It's a terrific starter.

Then, the morning after the night before, get up nice and early and
head to play in the regional Dodgeball finals (I'm not making this up)
The mighty Flamingos (that's us) won our first two games, made the
semi-finals, then crumbled under the pressure of playing 'pro' teams
and were humiliated into 4th place.

My whole body aches this morning. Dodgeball isn't for me.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Canada Tax Dollars - where they go..
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/canada.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/canada.htm "> AOL </a>

Zombie Chick
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/zombie.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/zombie.htm "> AOL </a>

Obama Turns Into Pig
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/obama_pig.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/obama_pig.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A man walks into a fish and chip shop with a fish under his arm.

"Do you have any fishcakes?" he asks.

"Yes, of course," says the fish shop owner.

"Great," replies the man, nodding at the fish under his arm, "It's
his birthday."

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26309124
or send a blank email to leave-26309124-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

Fun4U: Which girlfriend should I marry?

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

I had three girlfriends, but wasn't sure which one to marry. So I decided
to give each one $5000 and see how each of them spends it.

The first one went out and gets a total makeover with the money. She gets
new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and comes
back to my place and says, "I spent the money so I could look pretty
for you because I love you so much." I was very touched and aroused,
and we had lots of great sex.

The second one went out and bought new golf clubs, a CD player, a
television, and a stereo and brings them back to me as gifts. This
sweet girl looked into my eyes and said, "I bought these gifts for you
with the money because I love you so much." I watched my new television
with great enjoyment!

The third one takes the $5000 and invested it in the stock market, doubled
her investment, returns the original $5000 to me and reinvests the
rest. She says, "I am investing the rest of the money for our future
because I love you so much." She has enough to buy me a new boat.

I thought long and hard about how each of the women spent the money and
decided to marry the one with the biggest tits.

-=[-(3658)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3658 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: Kitty & Lady Find Love

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

One day, a fairy visits a lonely widow and says that she is there to give
her 3 wishes.

"I wish I was 21 and beautiful!" The wish is instantly granted.

"I wish I had a million dollars!" The wish is granted.

"I wish that my cat here were the most handsome guy in the world and were
madly in love with me." The wish is granted.

The now young lady and her man go inside. They start to cuddle, and the
man looks at her. "Aren't you upset you had me fixed?"

-=[-(3657)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3657 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

JE - McCain Campaign in Trouble

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wednesday 22nd October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Well folks. It's been a busy week for me, but times are a changing.
This afternoon I've been informed my usual supplier of advertising
has deserted me, leaving me potentially penniless and losing money
through sending the good old Joke Email!
But fear not! I shall soldier on.

You may notice a few more Google ads appearing, since its apparent
to me that Google is taking over the world and it's never a bad
idea to be the right side of that debate.

So, no more annoying popunders, pop ups, inter-stitials (thats the
'industry' term for the ads that used to appear between pages. So,
much as I'd love to continue to flog the golden horse, this no
longer seems viable, so enjoy the jokes / humor / fun sans advert
overload!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
McCain Campaign is Terminal
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/mccain_trouble.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/mccain_trouble.htm "> AOL </a>

High Speed VW Bug Chase:
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/bug.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/bug.htm "> AOL </a>

Hello, My Name is Dumbass:
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dumb.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dumb.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A wealthy hospital patron was being shown around the urology ward.

During her tour she passed a room where a male patient was pleasuring himself
furiously.

Oh my GOD!' screamed the woman. 'That's disgraceful! Why is he doing
that?' The doctor who was leading the tour calmly explained,

'I'm very sorry that you were exposed to that, but this man has a
serious condition where his testicles rapidly fill with s3men, and if he
doesn't do that at least five times a day, he'll be in extreme pain and
his testicles could easily rupture.'

'Oh, well in that case, I guess it's okay,' said the woman.

As they passed by the very next room, they saw a male patient laying in
bed while a nurse performed *ahem* an act on him.

Again, the woman screamed,

'Oh my GOD! How can THAT be justified?'

Again the doctor spoke very calmly,

'Same illness, private insurance.'

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26285641
or send a blank email to leave-26285641-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

JE - Washington Insider

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Monday 20th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Afternoon folks. In a rush, time flying by!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Washington Insiders
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/washington.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/washington.htm "> AOL </a>

Palin as New Wonder Woman:
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=489&pid=37594&s=n
<a href=" http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=489&pid=37594&s=n "> AOL </a>

Out of This World:
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=489&pid=33562&s=n
<a href=" http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=489&pid=33562&s=n "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
There's a man named Ralph that goes into a bar, looking very depressed.
A friend approaches him and asks, "Why the long face, Ralph?" "Oh, I'm
just bored. I know every person in the entire world now, and there's
just nothing left to challenge me."

His friend says, "No, you can't know everyone. Do you know Paul
McCartney?"He says, "Sure, Paul's an old friend of mine. Here, I'll show
you." He goes over to a phone, dials a number. His friend overhears a
British accent, "Hey Ralph, how ya doing?"He talks for a while, but when
Ralph hangs up, his friend is not really sure that it was Paul McCartney
on the other end of the line, so he asks him if he knows the
president.Ralph says, "Sure, we go way back." This time he lets him
listen in as he calls a private number. It sounds like the president on
the other end of the line, and they go into a big discussion of the
current economic scene, and Ralph offers a few suggestions. Drawing the
conversation to a close, Ralph wishes him well and hangs up.His friend
is a little dumbfounded at this point.

"Well, there must be someone that you don't know." He goes over a few
more people in his mind, and thinks, 'He can't possibly know the Pope.
After all, he's a Protestant.'But Ralph claims to know him, so to
convince himself otherwise, his friend decides to fly both himself and
Ralph to the Vatican to get positive proof of Ralph's conviction. So
they arrive at the Vatican, and Ralph suggests that his friend wait out
in the Papal square until Ralph has cleared things with the Pope. He's
standing in the courtyard, when who walks out onto the balcony of the
private residence, arm in arm with the Pope, but Ralph.Ralph looks down,
sees that his friend has apparently passed out, and runs down to see
what can be done for him. "What happened to you? Couldn't you accept the
fact that I really do know the Pope?""No, I'd begun to accept that
possibility. But what really took my breath away was some stranger
standing next to me who said, 'Who's that guy standing there with Ralph?'"

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26273084
or send a blank email to leave-26273084-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

Fun4U: So you want to marry a millionaire?

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

A very rich man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry
her right away. She said, "But we don't know anything about each
other." He said,"That's all right, we'll learn about each other as
we go along." So she consented, and they were married, and went on
a honeymoon to a very nice resort. So one morning they were lying by
the pool, when he got up off of his towel, climbed up to the 10-meter
board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, this followed by a three
rotations in jackknife position, where he straightened out and cut the
water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and
lay down on the towel.

"That was incredible!" she said.

"I used to be an Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn
more about ourselves as we went along." So she got up, jumped in the
pool, and started doing laps. After about thirty laps she climbed back
out and lay down on her towel hardly out of breath.

"That was incredible!" he said. "Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

"No," she said, "I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of
the canal."

-=[-(3656)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3656 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: Why did the blonde get fired...

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?

She was throwing away all the W's.

-=[-(3655)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3655 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: How Bill and Hillary Really Met

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

How Bill and Hillary really met: They both dated the same girl in college.

-=[-(3653)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3653 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: Archaeologist's Wife

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have -- the older she
gets the more interested he is in her.

-=[-(3654)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.7%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3654 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

JE - Animal Rights

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wednesday 15th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Keep laughing. Stocks can only go sooo low after all.
And it's only 'paper money' as my Mom tells me.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Animal Rights
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/animal_rights.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/animal_rights.htm "> AOL </a>

Squirt First, Questions Later
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/questions.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/questions.htm "> AOL </a>

Pigs in Lipstick
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/pigs.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/pigs.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
Don't shoot the messenger!

Antiques enthusiast Mary spent all her free time haunting second-hand
shops, flea markets, and other likely spots where she might encounter
the odd find: a valuable antique of some sort, whose seller was
unaware of its value and was offering it for a low price.

On most of her expeditions she came up empty, but she enjoyed the
thrill of the hunt and felt amply rewarded when she did manage to
purchase a valuable old something-or-other from its unwitting seller.

On one such expedition, buried in the back of a thrift shop, Mary
encountered a small, old-fashioned paraffin lighting device. Her heart
leapt at the sight of it; she was sure it was worth considerably more
than the quid on the price tag.

Unfortunately, though, her newest find was infested with small albino
insects that had jumped from the shop's resident cat. She bought it all the
same, though.

Now Mary had a little lamp. Its fleas were white as snow.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26246986
or send a blank email to leave-26246986-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

JE - Mc Owned

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Monday 13th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Enjoy the humor folks.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Mc Owned!
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/mc_owned.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/mc_owned.htm "> AOL </a>

Lesson in Respect
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/spork.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/spork.htm "> AOL </a>

You Monster
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/hypnotic.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/hypnotic.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A big-city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot
and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other
side of a fence. As he climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove
up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field,
and now I'm going to retrieve it."

The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming
over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in
the US and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take
everything you own."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do
things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the
Texas Three-Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Texas Three-Kick Rule?"

The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you
kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives
up."

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided
that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the
local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to
the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot
into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick
nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on
his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him
to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his
feet and said, "Okay, you old coot! Now, it's my turn!"

The old farmer smiled and said, "No, I give up. You can have the duck!"

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26238983
or send a blank email to leave-26238983-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

JE - Hedge Fund Redemption

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Thursday 9th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Hey one and all.
As many of you know, I do happen to work for a major financial
institution in the UK, so a little concerned right now about the state
of our economy and banking system.

So, whilst Rome burns, let's enjoy ourselves!

It's super frugal living from here on in!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
The Hedge Fund Redemption
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/hedge_fund.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/hedge_fund.htm "> AOL </a>

Robbed at Spork-Point
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/spork.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/spork.htm "> AOL </a>

Cat With Hypnotic Eyes
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/hypnotic.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/hypnotic.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
Q: What's the difference between a pit bull and a hockey mom?
A: One nurtures its children, the other sends them out to play on a frozen lake.

Q: What's the difference between Sarah Palin and a pit bull?
A: A pit bull doesn't think the universe is six thousand years old.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26224778
or send a blank email to leave-26224778-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

JE - Blending In

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Monday 6th October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Start of a new week. My stocks are battered, I may be out on
the street in weeks. Now is not the time to be in banking!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
How NOT to Blend In
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/blend_in.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/blend_in.htm "> AOL </a>

Sarah Palin Barracuda Lipstick:
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/lipstick.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/lipstick.htm "> AOL </a>

Tree Man Who Grew Roots:
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/roots.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/roots.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
I was playing golf with my wife. It was one of those days when I just
couldn't hit a bad shot, everything went straight down the fairway or
landed on the green. Unfortunately my wife was having just the
opposite sort of day. Everything she hit found the rough or a bunker.

We got to the eighteenth and my tee shot flew like an arrow straight
down the middle. Her drive was the most awful slice and went out of
bounds into the nearby pasture among the cattle.

We both went to look for her ball and just as we were about to give up
I spotted a glint of white coming from a cow's behind, just under its
tail. I lifted the tail just to make sure, then called to my wife,
"Here, honey, this looks like yours." That's the last thing I remember.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26212178
or send a blank email to leave-26212178-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

Fun4U: Working Relationship

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

A guy wakes up one morning with a hangover. "Honey, I know I made a fool
out of myself at the party last night, so tell me what I did."

"You got in an argument with your boss."

"Well, piss on him!!!" said the man.

"You did. He fired you."

"Well, screw him!"

"I did." said his wife. "You're back to work on Monday."

-=[-(3652)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.5%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3652 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

Fun4U: A Man With No Ears

-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-
-=[ Fun4you a service of FuN - wOrLd - http://www.hehe.at/funworld/ ]=-
-=[ un/subscribe requests @ http://www.hehe.at/funworld/fun4you.html ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

A man was in a bad accident and was injured. But the only permanent
damage he suffered was the loss of both ears, which made him very
self-conscious. However, he received a large sum of money from his
insurance company.

It was always his dream to own his own business, so he went out and
purchased a small, but expanding computer firm. But he realized that he
had no business knowledge at all, so he decided that he would have to
hire someone to run the business. He picked out three top candidates,
and interviewed each of them. The last question of the interview was
always the same.

"Do you notice anything unusual about me?" he asked the first candidate.

"Yes. You have no ears."

He quickly eliminated the first candidate.

"Do you notice anything unusual about me?" he asked the second candidate.

"Yes. You have no ears."

He quickly eliminated the second candidate.

"Do you notice anything unusual about me?" he asked the third candidate.

"Yes. You're wearing contacts."

Thinking he had found the man for the job he said, "That's correct. How
did you know?"

"You can't wear glasses if you don't have any freakin' ears."

-=[-(3651)---------------------------------------------------(lp:71.5%)--]=-
-=[ latest jokes online at http://funworld.hehe.at/archive/?id=latest ]=-
-=[ NEW! Go to http://www.hehe.at/funworld/archive/3651 ]=-
-=[ to rate this joke from 1 to 5. ]=-
-=[----------------------------------------------------------------------]=-

JE - Limitations of GW Bush

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wednesday 1st October, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Just a short one today folks.
I'm back from Turkey and 30 degree heat. I can confirm it was
a fantastic and well needed holiday!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Limitations of GW Bush
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/limitations.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/limitations.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke

Electronic Banking:
"I used a WaMu ATM today and it asked to borrow $20 till Friday."

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26188995
or send a blank email to leave-26188995-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/

JE - Obama wants to Eat

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Tuesday 30th September, 2008 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Just back from hols folks. Will update you tomorrow.
Until then..

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Obama Just Wants to Eat!
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/obama_food.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/obama_food.htm "> AOL </a>

Palin Patriotic Bikini
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/palin.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/palin.htm "> AOL </a>

Microsoft Merger With McDonalds
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/microsoft.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/microsoft.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
Joe was talking to his mate in the pub one evening, and he said, "I don't
know what to get my wife for her birthday - she has everything, and besides,
she can afford to buy anything she wants, so I'm stumped."

His mate said, "I have an idea - why don't you make up a certificate saying
she can have 60 minutes of great s*x, any way she wants it - she'll probably
be thrilled."

So that's just what Joe did.

The next day in the pub his mate said, "Well? Did you take my suggestion?"

"Yes, I did," said Joe.

"Did she like it?" He asked.

"Oh yes! she jumped up , thanked me, kissed me on the forehead and ran out
the door, yelling "I'll be back in an hour!!"

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wanna leave? See the base of this email for info.
Advertising info: http://www.jokeemail.com/advertinfo.htm

This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
---
You are currently subscribed to jokeemail as: jokesareus@optushome.com.au.
To unsubscribe click here: http://relay.netatlantic.com/u?id=41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81&n=T&l=jokeemail&o=26184610
or send a blank email to leave-26184610-41257149.2330f71b724a5ac03919b49177c4cd81@relay.netatlantic.com
---
Email delivered by http://www.netatlantic.com/