No Holds Barred! 04-11-08

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Everything above this line is NOT a sponsor of
No Holds Barred! and is put there by Topica.


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Welcome to all the new subscribers!
Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!


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Morris the dentist was called away from the dinner table to
take an urgent phone call. It was Mr. Tuckerman,
explaining that his teen age son had gotten himself into quite
a fix.

"See, he was kissing his girlfriend, and when my wife and
I came back from the movies we found them stuck
together...and we can't get them apart."

"I'll come right over, Mr. Tuckerman," said the dentist
calmly, "and don't worry about a thing. I have to unlock
teenagers' braces all the time."

Mr. Tuckerman whispered,.... "Yes, but from an IUD?"

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An elderly gentleman went to the local drug store and asked
the pharmacist for Viagra.

The pharmacist said "That's no problem. How many do you want?"

The man replied, "Just a few, maybe a half dozen, but can
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The pharmacist said, "That's too small a dose. That won't
get you through sex."

The gentleman said, "Oh, that's all right. I'm past eighty
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A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one
day. They come to a busy intersection, and the dog, ignoring the high
volume of traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right
out into the thick of traffic. This is followed by the screech of
tires and horns blaring as panicked drivers try desperately not to
run the pair down.

The blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on
the other side of the street, and the blind man pulls a cookie out of
his coat pocket, which he offers to the dog. A passerby, having
observed the near fatal incident, can't control his amazement and
says to the blind man, "Why on earth are you rewarding your dog with
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The blind man turns partially in his direction and replies, "To find
out where his head is, so I can kick his ass."

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More to come later....just remember there are "No Holds Barred" !!

Everything below this line is put in by Topica and
is NOT a sponsor of "No Holds Barred" !!

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