No Holds Barred! 04-04-08

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Everything above this line is NOT a sponsor of
No Holds Barred! and is put there by Topica.


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Welcome to all the new subscribers!
Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!


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Ten Signs Your DotCom Is On The Skids


1. The company CEO has moved from the corner office to the ledge
outside the corner office.
2. The manager informs you that the drinks in the company fridge
haven't been free and hands you a $4,800 Snapple bill.
3. The company president asks if anyone has a problem giving out a
little astrological advice over the phone while they work.
4. The head of R&D is spending more and more time in the park across
street with a metal detector he refers to as his "search engine."
5. There's now 10-year-old Indonesian boys on either side of you
assembling Nike running shoes.
6. Management is now using copies of the company prospectus exclusively
for rolling papers.
7. Next time you see the company's founder, he is wearing a paper hat
and telling you which one is the Diet Coke.
8. The human resources manager informs you that (though it wasn't
spelled out in black and white) giving conventioneers body massages was
indeed implied in your job description, and that it could also involve a
little "converging," if you know what he means.
9. You arrive at work to find that all the computers have been replaced
with Etch-a-Sketches.
10. Your boss concedes that he might be out of his teens before he's
able to retire.

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An extremely drunk man looking for a whorehouse stumbles
into a Podiatrist's office instead and weaves over to the
receptionist. Without looking up, she waves him over to the
examination bed and says, "Stick it through that curtain."

Looking forward to something kinky, the drunk pulls out his
penis and sticks it through the crack in the curtains.

"That's not a foot!" screams the receptionist.

"Holy shit, lady. I never knew you had a minimum!" replies
the drunk.

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Two little southern ladies, BobbySue and Marybelle, are
sitting in rockers on the porch.

BobbySue to Marybelle: "Marybelle in New York they have men
that kiss other men."

Marybelle gasps "They do?"

BobbySue says "Yes! They call them gays."

They rock a bit more and BobbySue says"Marybelle, in
New York they have women that kiss other women."

Marybelle gasps again "They do?'

BobbySue says"Yes! They call them lesbians"

They rock a little more and BobbySue says "Marybelle, in
New York they have men that kiss women's private parts!"

Marybelle gasps "They do? And WHAT do they call them?"

BobbySue says "I don't know, but when he was done I called
him PRECIOUS!"


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More to come later....just remember there are "No Holds Barred" !!

Everything below this line is put in by Topica and
is NOT a sponsor of "No Holds Barred" !!

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