JE - Smoking Cool?

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Tuesday 28th April, 2009 70,000 subscribers
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+ The Starter
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Hey folks.

Apologies for few joke emails last week. Things a little busy as I
prepare for my holidays over the next few weeks. Off to Oz and hopefully
Asia so long as Qantas honour their stopover pledge in my ticket (don't
ask!).

So, although Joke Email may be scant on my chat for a while, I'll
reprise the stories upon my return!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Smoking is Cool
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/smoking_cool.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/smoking_cool.htm "> AOL </a>

Tampon Prank Ends Badly
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/tampon.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/tampon.htm "> AOL </a>

20 Foot Backflip
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/backflip.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/backflip.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his
chicken coop.
The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says "OK old fart,
time for you to retire."

The old rooster replies, "Come on, surely you cannot handle all of
these chickens. Look what it has done to me.

Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?

"The young rooster says, "Beat it: You are washed up and I am taking
over." The old rooster says, "I tell you what, young stud.
I will race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins! gets the exclusive
domain over the entire chicken coop."

The young rooster laughs. "You know you don't stand a chance,

Old man. So, just to be fair, I will give you a head start."

The old rooster takes off running.

About 15 seconds later.

The young rooster takes off running after him. They round the Front
porch of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He is
only about 5 feet behind the old rooster and gaining fast.
The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting in his usual spot on the front
porch. When he sees the roosters running by. He grabs his shotgun and
- BOOM - He blows the young rooster to bits.

The farmer sadly shakes his head and says, "Darn.....third gay rooster
I bought this month."

Moral of this story? .
Don't mess with the OLD FARTS - age, skill, and treachery will always
overcome youth and arrogance!

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
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© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
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JE - Jackhammer issue

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
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Monday 20th April, 2009 70,000 subscribers
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+ The Starter
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Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Jackhammer Issue
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/jackhammer.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/jackhammer.htm "> AOL </a>

Dog Peeing Earns $100,000
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dog_pee.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/dog_pee.htm "> AOL </a>

Jessica Alba's Got Milk Photo
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/alba.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/alba.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
In his Saturday radio address, President Barack Obama told Somali pirates he
is sending Vice-President Joe Biden to meet with them aboard their dinghy to
resolve the crisis.

''I will not be held hostage to a situation that was allowed to grow and
fester under the previous administration. President Bush never reached out
to the Somali pirate community; instead, he arrogantly dismissed them as
barbarians and thieves.''

The President said the high seas entrepreneurs mistakenly targeted a U. S.
Flagged vessel because of dense fog caused by global warming. He has
authorized Vice-President Biden to share the Navy's ship identification
technology with pirates to avoid a repeat of the incident. In addition, the
President said he is prepared to meet the pirates at the White House for
talks.

''I fully acknowledge that decades of American imperialism have led us to
this point,'' the President continued. ''However, this all must come to an
end by the Sunday morning talk shows. If that deadline passes with no
resolution, I will order the American warships to withdraw, leaving Joe
Biden in that lifeboat with the pirates until they come to their senses and
beg to be rescued themselves. The choice is theirs.''

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JE - How Cool?

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
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Thursday 16th April, 2009
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+ The Starter
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Yee-ha!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
How Cool Are You?
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/coolness.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/coolness.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her
car broke down. An American Indian on horseback came along and offered her a
ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode
off.

The ride was uneventful, except that every few minutes the Indian would let
out a 'Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a' so loud that it echoed from the surrounding
hills.

When they arrived in town, he let her off at the local service station,
yelled one final 'Ye-e-e-e-h-a-a-a-a!' and rode off.
'What did you do to get that Indian so excited?' asked the service-station
attendant. 'Nothing,' the woman answered. 'I merely sat behind him on the
horse, put my arms around his waist, and held onto the saddle horn so I
wouldn't fall off.'

'Lady,' the attendant said, 'Indians don't use saddles.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
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[No Holds Barred] for APRIL 11 2009 -- EASTER EDITION

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                           Welcome to all the new subscribers!
            Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!
 
              PLEASE support this list by checking out the sponsors!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"All I Need to Know About Life I Learned from the Easter Bunny"
 
Don't put all of your eggs in one basket.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
Some body parts should be floppy.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.
The grass is always greener in someone else's basket.
An Easter bonnet can tame even the wildest hare.
To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Q: How do bunnies stay healthy?
A: Eggercise
 
Q: What do you call rabbits that marched in a long sweltering Easter
     parade?
A: Hot, cross bunnies.
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

SIGNS THE EASTER BUNNY IS NUTS
 
10. Neighbors describing him as "a quiet loner."
9. Removed from a department store last December after screaming at
    Santa, "You're going to die up there, fat man!"
8. Can't stop washing his paws.
7. Colorful eggs now filled with Prozac.
6. Apartment walls covered with photos of Sharon Stone.
5. Met with Dr. Kevorkian about the possibility of a "suicide egg."
4. Rotting corpse of Energizer bunny recently discovered in his crawl
    space.
3. Won't come out of his compound in Waco, Texas.
2. He's hippity-hopped up on crack.
1. Keeps rubbing himself for good luck.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Q: Why did a fellow rabbit say that the Easter Bunny was self-centered?
A: Because he is eggocentric.
 
Q: Where does Valentine's Day comes after Easter?
A: In the dictionary.
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Post-Resurrection Visit
 
It cannot be found in the scriptures, but one story has it that upon his
resurrection, the Lord appeared to a certain fisherman.
 
"I am Jesus.  My death has saved all who do or will believe, and I am
returned to show the Father's love and power."
 
"No, you're not Jesus, so bug off, you're scaring all the fish," answered
the old fisherman.
 
"I see thou are full of doubt. What would thee have me do to show who
I am?"
 
"Walk across the river," he tells Jesus.
 
So Jesus starts walking across the river. Next thing, he sinks and
disappears under the water.
 
After he swims back to shore, the old man says to him, "There you are,
see, you're not Jesus, you can't walk across water"
 
Jesus responds, "Well, I used to be able to do it until I got these
darned holes in my feet!"
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Altzheimer's Advantage - You can hide your own Easter eggs.
 
Q. What do Easter Bunny helpers get for making a basket?
A. Two points, just like anyone else.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                             TOONS
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
I've loaded a bunch of Easter toons on the site here:
 
23 clean Easter toons
http://able2laff.com/?cat=107
 
32 naughty Easter toons
http://able2laugh.com/?cat=106
 
From other sources...
83 Easter Cartoons from
editorial cartoons, comic strips and vintage cartoons
http://www.cartoonistgroup.com/bysubject/subject.php?sid=480
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               FUN PLACES TO CHECK OUT
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
Easter Fun Facts
http://www.happy-easter.com/facts.htm
 
A Devilish Egg Encounter
http://www.southernangel.com/food/deveggs.html
 
Easter Eggs Grandma�s Way
http://www.humorcolumnist.com/easter.htm
 
Bill Hicks - Gideons and the Easter Bunny
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AnjFhdO90Rg
 
Yak and the Story Of Easter
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=weBFmdLmKvI
 
The Easter Bunny Hates You
http://tinyurl.com/cb36oy
 
FAIL Easter Toys
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H7vhaX-UKPM
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                            GAME TIME
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
Bunny Trail Maze
http://www.easterfun.com/bunnytrail/index.html
 
Games for Easter Parties
http://tinyurl.com/d2tz5m
 
6 full on games for the week end
http://www.jokeroo.com/games/index.html
 
Daily Games
Cryptogram, Wordcross, Crossword Jumble & Jigsaw Puzzle
http://able2laff.com/?p=2383
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
To Join No Holds Barred
NoHoldsBarred-subscribe@Topica.com
 
To Unsubscribe
NoHoldsBarred-unsubscribe@Topica.com
 
Able2Laff - Belly-Laugh Central for Everyone
http://Able2Laff.com
 
Able2Laugh - For your Naughty Humor Needs
http://Able2Laugh.com
 
Able2Laugh Humor ezine - Humor of the Sinful Kind
Able2Laugh-subscribe@topica.com
 
Here is a WIDE variety of fun maillists for you
http://able2laff.com/EZ/

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JE - How to use Facebook

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Wednesday 8th April, 2009 70,000 subscribers
_________________________________________________________
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+ The Starter
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Howdy folks. Enjoy the humor.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
How to use Facebook
http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/facebook.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/facebook.htm "> AOL </a>

The Earth is Flat
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/flat.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/flat.htm "> AOL </a>

Supreme Deer Hunting
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/supreme.htm
<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/more/supreme.htm "> AOL </a>

+ General Joke
Bored during a long flight, an eminent scholar leaned over and woke up
the man sleeping next to him to ask if he would like to play a game.

"I'll ask you a question," he explained. "If you don't know the answer,
you pay me $5. But if I don't know the answer to your question I'll pay
you $50."

When the man agreed to play, the scholar asked, "What's the distance
from the earth to the moon?" Flummoxed, the man gave him the $5. "Ha!"
said the scholar. "It's 400 000 kilometres. Now it's your turn."

The man was silent for a few moments and then asked, "What goes up a
hill with three legs and comes down with four?"

The academic racked his brains for half an hour, and finally handed over
his $50. "Okay, okay, what is the answer?" he asked.

The man said, "I don't know," handed him a $5 bill and went back to sleep.

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
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[No Holds Barred] for APR 8 2009

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                           Welcome to all the new subscribers!
            Anything goes on this list so no one under 18 is welcome!
 
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~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A recent study found the average American walks about 900 miles per
year.
 
Another study found Americans drink, on average, 22 gallons of beer a
year.
 
That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles to the gallon.
 
Kind of makes you proud to be an American.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

(Today's filler...Hallmark writers having a bad day.)
 
Congratulations on your promotion.
Before you go...
 
Would you like to take this knife out of my back?
You'll probably need it again.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Due to inherit a fortune when his sickly, widower father died, Robert
decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So he went to a singles bar
and he searched until he spotted a woman whose beauty took his breath
away.
 
"Right now, I'm just an ordinary man," he said, walking up to her, "but
within a month or two, my father will pass and I'll inherit over 20
million dollars."
 
The woman went home with Robert, and four days later she became his
stepmother.
 
Men will never learn

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Your friends and I wanted to do
something special for your birthday.
 
So we're having you put to sleep.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
AS SEEN ON TV
Never Scrub your toilet bowl again. 
 
Try NeverScrub! for FREE.
 
NeverScrub! from KABOOM
- Snaps into your toilet tank in about 1 minute
- Keeps your bowl clean for 3-5 months
- Cleans thoroughly, even under the rim
 
http://tinyurl.com/5gdkm4
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
A young journalism graduate from Arkansas had gone to work for the
New York Times. His first assignment was to write a brief human
interest story. An idea came to him and he returned to one of the most
remote areas he knew of in his home state of Arkansas ..
 
Deep in the woods, he came upon a farmers house and decided this
would be a good place to start.
 
He introduced himself to the back country farmer and explained why he
was there. The farmer (named Farmer Mahon ) agreed to answer his
questions.
 
The reporter asked the farmer what event in his life had made him the
happiest?
 
Farmer Mahon replied, "One time a neighbor lost one of his sheep. We
all formed a posse and found it. After we all screwed it we took it back
to the farmer that lost it."
 
"I can't print that," said the reporter, "Is there another event that made
you really happy?"
 
Farmer Mahon thought for a minute and said, "Yep. One time the
daughter of another local farmer got lost. She was a good-lookin' young
girl. We all formed a posse and found her. After all of us screwed her,
we took her back to her daddy."
 
Again the reporter knew he couldn't print the story and decided to take
a different tack. He asked Farmer Mahon, "Is there any event in your
life that has made you really sad?"
 
Farmer Mahon hung his head and replied, "Well, I got lost once."
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
When we were together,
you always said you'd die for me.
 
Now that we've broken up,
I think it's time you kept your promise.
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                             TOONS
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
Ice cream
http://able2laugh.com/master/pix.php?pic=Dessertx018.jpg
 
EXTRA rare
http://able2laugh.com/master/pix.php?pic=Dinnerx011.jpg
 
Freak show!
http://able2laugh.com/master/pix.php?pic=freak09.jpg
 
Fruit, anyone?
http://able2laugh.com/master/pix.php?pic=Fruitx011.jpg
 
This is Gay!
http://able2laugh.com/master/pix.php?pic=GAY.jpg
 
Don't Jumping                
http://able2laff.com/master/pix.php?pic=dont-jumping-elevator.jpg
 
DUCK!     
http://able2laff.com/master/pix.php?pic=dsign111.jpg
 
When Rock Was Young                
http://able2laff.com/master/pix.php?pic=Elton-tot.jpg
 
FRAUD!                 
http://able2laff.com/master/pix.php?pic=FRAUD.jpg
 
Grimm Party                     
http://able2laff.com/master/pix.php?pic=Grimm.JPG
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
The Entertainment Coupon book is filled with up to 50% off
and 2-for-1 discounts on local dining, movies, groceries,
sporting events and more!
Discover how the book pays for itself!
Order today and get $5 off
the retail price and Free Shipping.
http://tinyurl.com/5bowbx
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                         MORE TOONS
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
A little fella
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/f0119.html
 
New airline offers plenty of amenities
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/f0120.html
 
Holiday
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/f0101.html
 
Doctor's fees
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/f0102.html
 
Edna!!!!
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/f0104.html
 
Good stuff!
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/22441.htm
 
Big Jugs
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/22439.htm
 
Good Doggie
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/22440.htm
 
Stripper Strike
http://www.buffaloschips.com/02280508.htm
 
Billy's Plan
http://www.buffaloschips.com/2280509.htm
 
Treat
http://www.sydesjokes.com/toons/link000020.html
 
Good customers
http://www.sydesjokes.com/toons/link000021.html
 
Random Joke & cartoon
http://www.Able2Laugh.com
 
Stolen Toon of the Day
http://stolen-jokes..com/JPGS/display_pic.php
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                               FUN PLACES TO CHECK OUT
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
William Shatner Demonstrates Proper Gun Control
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yJ7cfr9Lso
 
Martin and Lewis - Blow Me a Kiss
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LENKIbKCZ_U
 
Eating Your Way Through The Seven Deadly Sins
http://www.maddogproductions.com/ds_gluttony.htm
 
Those old Burma Shave hiway signs...
http://seniors-site.com/funstuff/burma.html
 
Chalk Art
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart.html
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart2.html
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/chalkart3.html
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
7 Hour Slumber is an all-natural nutritional supplement
that will help you fall asleep faster, sleep deeper,
awake more refreshed without feeling groggy.
 
Try it here - FREE bottle
http://tinyurl.com/crvjet
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                            GAME TIME
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
Robot War
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3467&pid=39949&s=n
 
Fun Facts Quiz 6
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3467&pid=39817&s=n
 
Mud and Blood 2
http://www.funpageexchange.com/out.php?u=3467&pid=39926&s=n
 
Eat everything smaller than you, don't get eaten
http://games.the-n.com/games/game_contain.php?id=888
 
Daily Games
Cryptogram, Wordcross, Crossword Jumble & Jigsaw Puzzle
http://able2laff.com/?p=2383
 
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
                                    Some Other Lists to Enjoy
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
 
Start your day with a chuckle!
Get some nice clean jokes
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To Unsubscribe
NoHoldsBarred-unsubscribe@Topica.com
 
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http://Able2Laugh.com
 
Able2Laugh Humor ezine - Humor of the Sinful Kind
Able2Laugh-subscribe@topica.com
 
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Check out our family of fun sites & maillists
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JE - Perks of the job

Welcome to the world-renowned JOKE EMAIL!
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Tuesday 7th April, 2009 70,000 subscribers
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Joke Email is distributed by subscription only. You are receiving
this email because you subscribed at the JokeEmail.com site.

+ The Starter
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Hey all.

Been away a few days so many apologies for lack of jokes and my banter.
I'll keep it short and sharp - due round the missus's shortly for my
tea and I can't be late (again!). On the plus side, my forays to Tango
dancing class on a Tuesday night with her (couple time she calls it)
are now finished and it's only two days to the weekend!!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

+ New Funny Pics:
Perks of the job
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<a href=" http://www.jokeemail.com/pictures/campus.htm "> AOL </a>

HMO Account Manager
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Starshine
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+ General Joke
The Titanic, on her maiden voyage, just set sail from the shores of
England. It was the most magnificent ship ever built, and everybody is
very excited. No expense has been spared - the vast dining rooms,
casinos, hundreds of neatly groomed waiters and polite service staff,
string quartets, the works.

Every night at the bar, they had this magician come on and perform the
most wonderfully amazing tricks of conjury the world had ever seen. It's
the first night of the voyage, and everyone is eager to see this great
man at work, except there was one slight problem. There was this parrot,
who'd sit on the bar top by the peanuts, and ruin each trick as the
magician performed them. Each time, the parrot would sit quietly until
the trick was almost completed, and say things like, "Squark! It's up
his sleeve!" or "Sqeeek! He's hidden it in the hat!" etc., and ruin the
trick for the magician.

Every time, the parrot would do this, and the magician would get madder
and madder as the night wore on.

The same happened on the next night, and the one after that. The
magician would shake with fury at this silly parrot ruining his world
famous show. He spent his days devising even better and more
stupendously amazing tricks in an effort to fool this bloody parrot.

One night, the magician is about to perform his greatest trick of the
voyage. The lights are dimmed, a hushed silence sweeps across the bar
floor, a drum roll builds up to a mighty crescendo as the magician
performs his final piece de resistance....and suddenly the ship hits an
iceberg and sinks...

For three days, the magician manages to cling to a door floating around
in the wreckage, starving, thirsty. On the third day, he notices at the
other end of the door, the parrot, sitting calmly and quietly, staring
back at him. For three more days the magician just glowers at him, not
saying a word - bitter, hushed, resentful, silence.

...Until one day, the parrot can't contain himself any longer and squarks,
"Alright! I give up! What have you done with the ship?!"

For more jokes, stroll on over to:
http://www.jokeemail.com/random.htm

+ Contact Information
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This ezine is registered with the British Library as: ISSN 1471-020X
© Copyright 2008 Thomas Evans. All Rights Reserved.
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