JE - We're Not Banking

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Friday 28th November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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+ The Starter
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Weekend time! Oh yes.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

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We're Not Lending
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Lousy Bum
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Bad Boy Drill
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+ General Joke
Once upon a time, there lived a green man in a green house which was
in a green district. One day while he was bathing, a female friend of
his came round to visit and rang the doorbell. Upon hearing his
doorbell, the green man hastily wrapped a towel round himself and went
to open the door. At that moment, he accidentally dropped his towel
and his friend screamed in shock. Still screaming, she ran off and got
knocked down when she dashed across a road. She died, the end.

What is the moral of the story?

Ans: NEVER cross the road when the green man is flashing.

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JE - Credit Crunch Monopoly

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Wednesday 26th November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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+ The Starter
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Right guys.
Bit of a short edition today, but nonetheless packed!

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

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Credit Crunch Monopoly
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Monkeys, Mar1juana & Crime
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Obama Irish Song is Smash Hit
http://www.jokeemail.com/more/irish.htm
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+ General Joke
At his first press conference as president-elect, Barack Obama said
America will succeed if we can put aside partisanship and politics.
In other words, we're totally screwed.

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JE - Hitting Rock Bottom

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Tuesday 25th November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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Morning all.

Had a busy weekend down in the north of England catching up with
my pals I met in Australia a few years ago (for the hardened JE
subscribers, you may recall the 'interesting' photos from my world
trip way back then..

http://www.jokeemail.com/travels/oz/oz1.htm

So, few beers, bit of partying, and then I enjoyed the boxing as
'Magic Man' Malinaggi presented a nice illusion of someone getting
whupped by our local hero Ricky 'Fatton'. Good times.

But back in Scotland today, back to the grind. Joy.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

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Hitting Rock Bottom..
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N1pple Twist
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Kissing Cops Banned
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+ General Joke
An intellectual puzzler to kick off the week!

An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one
orders a beer, the second orders half a beer the third asks for a
quarter of a beer. Before the next one can speak, the bartender says
"You're all idiots", and pours two beers.

If you don't get it, consult a friendly maths geek.

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JE - Opinions Best Kept to Yourself

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Friday 21st November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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Tom Evans
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I Look Like My Dog
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Dirty Harry
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+ General Joke
The Yuppie was accosted by a hooker. She said,
"How 'bout some relaxing fun honey... only $50... you look all uptight."

"No way!" the man responded. "I'm married!!!"

"So???" queried the hooker.

"My wife only charges $35."

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JE - Hugo Chavez Saves the Economy

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Wednesday 19th November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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+ The Starter
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Ho hum. Here's todays humor for you lucky lucky people.

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

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Cutest Kitten Ever
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Gorgeous Person Day
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+ General Joke
It's election day. A conservative goes in to a bar and orders 10 shots of whisky.

One by one is drinks them down.

The bartender, a RINO, says "wow, what was that about?"

The conservative replies, "Just cast my vote for McCain."

Bartender says, "Great, let me buy you another one"

Conservative says,
"No thanks, if 10 doesn't wash the taste out of my mouth nothing will"

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JE - George Can't Save the Economy

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Monday 17th November, 2008 70,000 subscribers
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Morning, morning!

Slow weekend for me. I sense I am - like others - attempting to
save cash by staying in over the weekend and frugally watching
TV on Saturday nights than going out. This recession lark isn't
too much fun...

Tom Evans
Editor - Joke Email

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Cheating Husband
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Palin as New Wonder Woman
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+ General Joke
A husband and wife were at a party chatting with some friends when the
subject of marriage counseling came up. "Oh, we'll never need that. My
husband and I have a great relationship," the wife explained.

"He was a communications major in college and I majored in theater arts.
He communicates real well and I just act like I'm listening."

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Fun4U: Great Writer

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There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to
become a great writer.

When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the
whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly
emotional level. Stuff that will make them scream, cry, and howl in
pain and anger!"

He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.

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